Almost Tragic

Driving can enlighten you.

Especially on a sunny day, when the traffic is light.  And you are just going.  Going.

But you have a destination.

And you don’t really want it.

Freedom is a luxury, is it not?  We all claim it, take it for granted, quote it, shout it.

But none of us truly owns it.

Oh those wings were clipped.  Long ago.  One must be responsible, practical, okay, perfect.  According to everyone else.

Dreams: cut!  Desires: cut!

Live for others, work, produce, accept, support, shut up.

You were never young, trusting, innocent, positive, happy.  What they think.

Traveling.  Everywhere.  Falling in love with the world.  Sure I was.  I also believed in my sacred pursuit of happiness.  Fail.

Don’t ruffle feathers, keep a low profile, go with the flow.  Any more clichés come to mind?

The sun is bright, I need to pull down the sun visor.   But I yearn for the sun to possess me.  Give me courage, please.  Make me brave, make me confident, make me assertive, give me direction.  Cancel my unwarranted sense of guilt about EVERYTHING  Because I’m a woman, and women suffer endlessly for sins not committed.

Give me the world to explore, repair my wings, damn it!  I gave them up them too early.

Why must I restrain myself?  Disappear into anonymity and boredom to boost comfort and stability for others?  I don’t really like to cease existing.  Don’t wish to blend into the routine background of a life never fully lived.  Frustration and resentment are not good companions.  My journey is not over, why should I blend it with the necessities of others?

The glittering of the sun rays on the timeless river distracts me.  Sheer beauty.  Seize this moment.  Inhale it.  It won’t last.

Freedom is only a concept.

Put the directional on, must bear right.

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